How to Talk to Your Boss About Your Mental Health - The Muse

How to Talk to Your Boss About Your Mental Health - The MuseHow to Talk to Your Boss About Your Mental Health A close friend of mine suffers from panic attacks. While he generally knows how to keep them at bay, theyre sometimes unpreventable. Before a recent business trip when hed been experiencing a particularly difficult time in his life, making the anxiety even worse, he began to fear getting on the plane (with his companys COO, nonetheless). I encouraged him to be candid with his anfhrer and with his traveling companion. It took some cajoling on my part, but eventually, my friend realized that he needed to be straightforward with his manager about his situation or risk something far worse.This got me thinking though. Sure, it was easy enough for me to instruct him to reveal this hugely personal part of himself, but I wasnt the one who had to face unterstellung people at work every day. Once you admit that you struggle with anxiety, depression, ADHD, or zweipolig disorder, are you just putting a scarlet-like letter on yourself? Are you setting yourself up for failure read in the form of not getting the big project or the promotion? Of course, being discriminated against because of any kind of mental health issue is illegal (more on this below), but that doesnt mean that your concerns with opening up about them arent valid.I trusted that Muse Coach and Licensed Social Worker, Melody Wilding, would know far more than me how to proceed, even though I dont think the advice I gave my friend in his time of need was wrong. His flight was postponed by a full day, giving him more time to prepare for the departure (time he used to visit his psychiatrist, in fact). He reported that his COO was glad hed been honest, explaining that hes familiar with anxiety disorder, having a family member who faces a similar challenge. The trip ended up going off without a hitch if there had been any issues though, at least the COO wouldnt have been shell-shocked. Understand Where You AreTheres something about being prepared that often adds a level of security to things. And yet, I asked Wilding, at what point do you reveal this information to your boss? During the interview? Once you have a job offer? As I half-suspected, Wilding tells me that there is no single right answer. What you decide to do varies depending on the individuals conditions, symptoms, and comfort level in addition to the dynamics and culture of the workplace.It stands to reason that because mental health issues are such delicate ones, disclosure is a very personal decision, explains Wilding. If youre getting by OK, and your work isnt suffering, you may not feel comfortable making a big announcement that essentially reveals your medical history. But, if the state of your mental health is starting to interfere with your work and your ability to, well, do your job, Wilding says youll want to speak with your boss, especially if youre in need of accommodations or are going to need time off. If you simply go in asking for time off due to a personal issue or emergency, know that you may be asked about the nature of your condition, by which point, youll probably have to disclose more information, though this doesnt mean you have to read your medical chart to anyone. Find an Appropriate TimeIf your relationship with your boss is good, if you communicate often, and if you trust him or her, sharing some details of your situation will likely be a lot easier than if the workplace culture is a challenging, stiff one where its all work and no play, not ever. This is when scripting what youre going to say and being ready with a list of things youve been excelling at can come in extra handy. If you and your boss have poor communication, you might consider paying a visit to the HR department first. Oftentimes, these individuals are better trained and equipped to assist in these complicated areas.While most people probably wont choose to disclose any details during the hiring process, if your issue is one that you struggle to keep under control, waiting until you get the offer and sign on the dotted line, after which you begin working and drop the ball on a major assignment solely due to your condition, probably isnt your best bet. Instead, Wilding says, you may need to be very up front and disclose during the interview process. Youll want to frame it, and put it in context, so thats not the thing the interviewer is remembering about you. If youre a part of a support group, it can be a good idea to speak to others about how theyve approached this delicate situation. Many of us have felt over-tired, over-worked, just flat-out exhausted. You may even be familiar with burnout. Maybe you immediately took a personal day or submitted a vacation request. Perhaps you approached your boss about your workload or figured out a way to finally start delegating some of your tasks. Whatever you felt like during that crazy, busy work period cant compare to a serious, depressive epi sode. And if youve been diagnosed with depression, a few days off from work arent likely to whip you back in shape. You should be talking to your doctor or a trusted medical professional, but you should also plan to have a conversation with your manager. Wilding says, however, that if youre in the thick of a depressive episode, for example, it might be best to wait until youre in a better place so you have the energy and can appropriately bring yourself to have the best conversation with your employer.Maintain Your PrivacyRegardless of the conversation you have with your boss, you need only reveal as much as youre comfortable with. You do not need to go into a lengthy explanation of your familys history with bipolar disorder, nor do you need to give a run-down of all of your panic attacks. For example, if you have ADHD but this isnt something you want to state as such, you might consider telling your supervisor that you have issues with concentration that affect your ability to work , Wilding says. Its also appropriate to reveal that you have a medical issue or condition without actually mentioning your diagnosis by name, Wilding elaborates.Although you may feel embarrassed by your mental health issues as my friend certainly was, you are far from alone. Wilding believes that as a culture were (slowly) approaching a greater acceptance of such issues. Were having more conversations and understanding that the open dialogue around mental health and well being can be healing in and of itself. One way of speaking to your employer about your situation may be to reframe the situation as an opportunity, suggests Wilding. You do this by regularly sharing your strengths, working with your team to create an optimal working situation, and being as productive as possible when all is well. And, of course, if youre not already, you should be working with a licensed mental health professional. This person is trained to help you develop coping skills, process your worries and co ncerns, Wilding explains. He or she may even offer to role play with you so that youre confident and prepared before you sit your boss down to tell him whats been going on and what he can anticipate based on what youre sharing.Know the LawAbove all, as awkward as the discussion may feel, go into it knowing that you are protected. The Americans with Disabilities Act, which your HR department should be familiar with, prohibits discrimination against persons with disabilities in employment The act further stipulates that Anyone known to have a history of mental disorders can be considered disabled. That means you have rights and shouldnt be worried that your employer will act against you simply because you open up about whats happening. Because the law allows for qualified people to be accommodated to a reasonable extent, Wilding points out that, depending on the nature of the impairment, a person may be eligible for accommodations such as a flexible schedule or work from home privileg es. Better than assuming a couple of personal days will get you where you need to be, you might consider chatting with your boss about flex hours or remote working schedule thats not determined in advance but rather is decided when you need it most. If and when you do decide to disclose, the information you reveal will be kept confidential. Since overall well being and mental health issues arent as hidden as they once were, any companies, in fact, have resources for which you can locate behavioral health services, again, if you arent already seeing someone. While I know it is easier said than done, you really shouldnt be ashamed of your mental health issues or let them prevent you from going after the job you want or the career you deserve.Editors Note This article is for general informational purposes only. It is not medical advice and should not be used to make a diagnosis or treat a condition. If your mental health is suffering, please consult with a medical specialist.